The Telephone Is Dead -- ::SHE+ILA::'s Response [$65]

More about The Telephone Is Dead -- ::SHE+ILA::'s Response [$65]

First, see the artwork titled "The Telephone Is Dead". Then get a soldering iron and four 0.1 uF condensers (oops -- capacitors, lol) and a couple of audio cables. Having built that (Note: if your telephony vendor's contract disallows you hacking your phone then CHANGE YOUR CONTRACT! I use "Racoon" by B.T.) then use the following code to build a TCP/IP to Telephony gateway :
{! SpeakThread; ListenThread; DTMFmonitor !};
SpeakThread <:: {? ?WinsockIn : {PhoneMic << WinsockIn} ?};
ListenThread <:: {? ?PhoneEar : {WinsockOut << PhoneEar} ?};
DTMFmonitor <:: {? ?DTMFqueue : {Menu} ?};
Now you can use a TCP/IP connection to talk to your phone from anywhere (lol), or modify the code and make a fully-fledged IVR (Interactive Voice Response system , so that everyone who phones you has to select from a menu (Press 1 to leave a message, Press 2 to access your personal mailbox, Press 3 for system statistics, Press 4 to play a game (lol), etc. etc. hehehe!). Give all your friends Passwords, and confuse those random telesales f00lz! :) Hint: as your users are paying 20p per minute to phone you, keep the menus short (or tell them to Email you instead)...