"Our prize warship will be laughed from the skies!

More about "Our prize warship will be laughed from the skies!

...screamed the Duchess as the military parade introduced its much heralded airship to the public for the first time, a ship rumored by its inventor that will strike terror into the hearts of all that will see it approaching.
Egglesbert von Phartzinzebagg, its inventor, quickly countered with a reply to save his skin.
"Ahhh, my Duchess, in your brilliance you have ascertained our greatest secret weapon on this ship, a psychological weapon, for as you see, when the targeted citizenry gaze upon this seemingly affable lame duck limping out of the clouds, their guard will be let down as they find themselves buckling over in fits of laughter and hysteria, and at their most vulnerable, that's when we attack. Observe that false tower over yonder, which will serve as a target as we demonstrate the sheer power and energy harnessed by this weapon of DOOOOOM!"
The submarine in the open plaza's adjacent waterway loosened its tangled hold on the listing airship as its tiny paddlelike wings flapped with a full rudder to turn it as closely as it could towards the intended target, a large flat cutout of the Duchess's observation tower but so amateurishly painted and detailed it looked like it was created to illustrate a satirical piece on the Duchess. Either that, or a group of drunken school children.
Seconds later, a cannon affixed to the starboard side of the airship fired its payload, but the listing angle of the ship caused two catastrophic events: the cannonball's vector, severely compromised, brought it to hit not it's intended target, but far short of it, landing in the populous flower market, at the Market's busiest hour, when tourists and citizens alike descended upon it for photo ops and souvenirs. The second mass casualty occurred when the cannon's recoil sent the flying warship spinning back and clockwise testing the cannon from the airship as it dropped directly down into the now of the submarine, tearing it off and allowing in enough water that sunk it almost immediately. The airship was still tethered to the submarine when it hit the bottom of the waterway which was shallow enough to leave the airship float a couple meters above the water., Still listing to it's starboard and spinning until it stopped, and spun in the opposite direction, each time spinning a little less, its crew nauseous from the spinning, their heads leaning out of windows releasing the contents from their celebratory breakfast provided by the Duchess an hour earlier.
The Duchess, infuriated, turned to stare at von Phartenzebagg with the look of murder in her eyes, stepping toward him with raised jeweled walking cane poised to crack open his