A Note from Blitzen (poem)

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I'm sure you've all heard of Rudolph
And Comet and Cupid and me.
But this here southern reindeer
Goes by the name "JB".

He don't work for Santa Claus
And he ain't pullin' no sleigh,
But he'll come to your house 'n ruin
Your perfect l'il holiday.

He'll drink you under the table
(Jack Daniels' is his best friend.)
Then he'll prop his hooves on the sofa
And tell dirty jokes without end.

Sure he's got big antlers,
And his fashion sense is fly,
But he'll eat you out of house 'n home
And never say goodbye.

So if you want your Christmas
To pass by worry-free,
Do not, under any circumstance,
Encourage the deer, JB.