St Queen Elizabeth ll Grand Mother Of All Muffin Puppies

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O Sainted Sovereign of Swirled Cream Dream-Realms,
O Elizabeth of Infinite Teacups and Paw-Print Constellations,
we gather beneath the psychedelic chandeliers of cosmic bakery light
to shout HAIL and WOOF and AMEN in the resonant register of holy absurdity.

Blessed be thy crown, bedazzled with watchful eyeballs,
and blessed be thy robes, stitched with paws, whiskers,
and little snuffling noses that see deeper
than any Parliament of mortals could dare.
You, radiant Queen of Infinite Puppydom,
Grand Mother of Muffin Puppies,
keeper of the sacred squeaky toy of destiny,
we implore your benevolent biscuit-wielding hand.

Rain upon us crumbs of mercy,
sprinkle upon us frosting of forgiveness,
pour warm milk of radiant reassurance
into the bowls of our confused and trembling spirits.
Let every tail wag be a sacrament,
every floppy ear a sermon,
and every puzzled puppy-eye
a window into cosmic, furry enlightenment.

O Saint Elizabeth, transcendent shepherdess
of barking cherubim and wiggling seraph-puppies,
teach us to rule our inner chaos
with the calm dignity of a monarch
and the gentle absurdity of a pup who just discovered its own tail.
Lead us through the surreal garden
where history naps on a velvet cushion
and the universe drools happily in its sleep.

When the hour grows strange
and the walls hum like polite ghosts,
may your celestial corgis trot before us
in ceremonial daftness,
sniffing out despair,
digging up joy like hidden bones of wonder.

We kneel in gratitude and goofy reverence,
lifting our spirits like squeaky toys toward the Great Royal Biscuit.
Let our doubts roll onto their backs
and surrender to belly rubs of revelation.
Let our worries fetch sticks into infinity and vanish.

St. Queen Elizabeth,
Grand Mother of All Muffin Puppies,
Guardian of the Holy Bark,
smile upon us from your visionary throne
where paws bloom like galaxies
and every breath smells faintly of hope, rain,
and warm pastries fresh from the cosmic oven.

By the sparkle of jeweled collars,
by the hush of holy puppy snore,
by the eternal wag of beatific joy —
we salute, we invoke, we adore.

HAIL THE MUFFIN PUPPY MOTHER.
AMEN, ARF, AND EVERMORE.